Sunday 29 December 2013

399 - Day 9/14 - It's True: Nazis Hated Wargamers

I managed to squeeze in another half-hour of clandestine itinerant painting today, but far more importantly (as I'm at home) I've been reading some quality literature:

I love Commando Comics. I bought about 400 of them for £50 in 1998 and I'm still slowly working through them all - a few more each visit. Not that it matters much as they all rely upon the same four-or-five narrative arcs...

ANYWAY,

Today I got to enjoy 'Eyes That See in the Dark' (No. 2096)
[all pics from cruddy phone - sorry!]

and within it, the cruel, fanatical Nazi decides to torture the peace-loving scientist by - yup - destroying his collection of tin soldiers for wargaming. Bafflingly this works. More bafflingly, it kind of becomes a plot point. Kind of. Here's the detail:

[Title: ANGERED BY THE PROFESSOR'S LACK OF CO-OPERATION, LUTCHEN TRIED A DIFFERENT APPROACH. SEIZING UP A SLEDGE-HAMMER HE'D BROUGHT WITH HIM, HE STRODE INTO THE NEXT ROOM.
Lutchen: FOR AN INTELLIGENT MAN YOU KNOW VERY LITTLE. CLEARLY I MUST CONVINCE YOU OF THE SERIOUSNESS OF THE SITUATION.]
[Title: HE KNEW PRECISELY WHERE HIS VICTIM'S WEAK POINT LAY, SO HE SMASHED THE WAR-GAMES MODELS WITH SADISTIC PLEASURE.
Professor: NO! MY LITTLE TIN SOLDIERS!
Lutchen: YOU AND THAT ENGLISHMAN SPEND HOURS ON THESE . . . THESE CHILDREN'S PLAYTHINGS.]
[Title: LEAPING OVER THE GUARD'S UNCONSCIOUS FORM, HE RACED THROUGH THE HOUSE TO FIND KLEIBER AMID THE PITIFUL WRECKAGE OF HIS MODELS.
Kleiber: LOOK WHAT THOSE MONSTERS DID TO MY LITTLE TIN SOLDIERS . . .
Hero: WE'VE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE LUTCHEN COMES BACK.]

What would you do, eh?

Bastards.

8 comments:

  1. That is bizarre. Weirdest blog entry thus far! You win. :)

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  2. My friends sat on my giant Figures in Comfort army case and de-constructed some of my DKK. Which is why they now live in a KR aloomium case.

    But that was not an act of malice; they just wanted to look out of the window.

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    Replies
    1. I think he means his late associates are the ones in the KR case - at the bottom of the River Isis...

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  3. Oh yes, They are still my friends. One is now very old and completely sparked out after eating his dinner, the other has got her back leg in the air and is licking her arse in the middle of the living room.

    And the DKK are safe in their rigid case. Any new DKK that I may or may not get in the future would also be similarly protected.

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  4. Your friends don't have any manners either! ;)
    As for the dreaded Hun, damn Nazi's, down with them I say! Ah... hang-on... we've done that one! Right next lot of Wargamer Haters/dislikers? Ill-informed religious nuts or over protective parents? Or society in general?? Your move Admiral.

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  5. What a schweinhund! I have every faith that he will get his comeuppance ;-)

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Thanks for taking the time to comment!